No Negative Nellies Around Here
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No Negative Nellies Around Here
One of my biggest pet peeves is people who are negative. Recently, I was working the registration table at my church for our annual women’s conference and a lovely lady came up and said she wanted to sign up. “Great! Let’s complete this form and you will be good to go.”
When she got to the line about email, she said, “Oh, I don’t have an email – it is just a complete waste of time.” OK, I thought we can communicate via phone if need be. “And I don’t have text or many minutes on my phone so I don’t want to give you my phone number.” Alrighty then…all we need is shirt size. “Medium is my size…last year I ordered a medium and got a large and it is impossible for me to wear.” At this point, I knew there was no way I was going to make her happy. Nothing could go right so I took her check…gave her a big smile and made a mental note to be sure to personally hand her a medium t-shirt.
As she walked away I thought what has happened to her? What meanness or bullying or abuse has happened in her life to cause her to be so negative? Now, I know that just because bad things have happened to someone doesn’t mean they have to be negative – they can choose to not be a victim but be victorious in the situation. However, I have to believe that she was not born this way. I can’t imagine her walking into kindergarten and start complaining about the desk and whining about the softness of the pillow during nap time.
What is so sad about this is she probably has no idea what damage her negativity is causing in her life. What relationships have been lost as a result? What experiences has she missed out on because no one wanted her around? What joy is she missing because she always sees the glass half empty, if not completely, empty? And so often our attitudes become self-fulfilling. “I told you that no one really cares for me.” “Once again, I am alone on this holiday.” “Didn’t I say they have the worst service at this restaurant.”
At the end, I cannot help her but I can ask myself about my own attitude. Am I bringing hope and joy and life to situations or am I being Debbie Downer? Am I a person that people want around because my honesty is refreshing and not cutting? My protectiveness is a comfort and not a burden?
Are you willing to ask yourself the same question? Your tendencies may not be the same as mine but we all bring something to the table. Is it a sweet aroma or is it a stench?